Inspirational Foreplay

For the last month and a half, I have been feeling a little uninspired to test out new recipes. I ordered a lot of take-out and have only made simple dishes just so that I could quickly put something healthy in my belly. I wasn’t really excited about food. I know when I’ve hit a cooking rut because I stop staying up late in bed researching recipes, making lists of dishes I want to try, and drooling over food pics on Instagram.

One night I was bored and finally decided to reorganize my pot and pan cupboard. This sparked my desire to replace some of my dinky cookware. I finally purchased a Le Creuset Cerise Braiser that I had been eyeing for over 4 months. Next, I invested in a nicer wooden cutting board from Amazon and a Lodge cast iron skillet.

Then I started organizing my dishware and glassware cupboards and ended up getting rid of most of my plastic plates and cups. If you’re wondering why I have plastic plates and cups, it’s because they are pool-safe and my apartment building has a rooftop pool. Also, I’m super clumsy and I break everything. My old neighbor used to say that when something breaks, it takes the place of something bad that was about to happen and I would like to believe that. I have 1 drinking glass and 2 plates left from a set a 4. My cupboards were a mess and mismatched. During the process of organizing my kitchen, I somehow found myself at World Market 4 times last week. I got some new bowls, plates, a cooking utensil holder, a salt cellar, and measuring tools. I trekked out to the valley to Home Goods and got an 8-quart stock pot, which is essential for me because my favorite thing to make is soup and I fill my smaller pots to the rim when I cook. I also ordered a smaller 2-quart pot and some new kitchen towels from Bed and Bath.

And then it happened. I finally felt inspired! Sometimes retail therapy really does work (not a replacement for real mental therapy though). I call this process Inspirational Foreplay. Not the retail therapy specifically but doing anything that helps get you excited to do the thing that you really need to do. In my case, it was reorganizing my kitchen and buying new supplies that got me in the mood to cook again. Sometimes you just need to work up the energy for the task at hand, in the same way you need to stretch or warm up before a tough work-out session or whet your appetite before a big meal. That is Inspirational Foreplay! In the last week alone, I’ve made Coconut Turmeric Chicken Soup, Pan-Seared Seabass, Braised Red Wine Short Ribs Over Potato Mash with Roasted Carrots and Brussel Sprouts, Linguini-Fini with Lump Crab and Chili, and Red Wine Garlic Butter Mushrooms. I’ll be posting recipes soon.

This process of Inspirational Foreplay for my cooking reminds me of when I was 24 years old and I was breaking up with my college boyfriend of 6 years, whom I had lived with for 3 of those years. I remember telling my therapist that I felt like I was stuck in a rut and I needed to change some things in my life. One of those changes was getting out of the relationship and the other was switching careers from wealth management to fashion. I confessed to my therapist that I was scared I wouldn’t follow through with the break-up even though I strongly believed it needed to happen. It’s hard to break someone’s heart even when you know it’s the right thing to do. It’s also scary to venture back out there on your own after your life was so heavily intertwined with someone else’s. Living together made things even more complicated. I mean, what do you do? Crash at your friend’s place immediately until you find a new place? Put a deposit on the first apartment you find? Divvy up all your furniture? My therapist suggested that in order to prepare me for the break-up and assure myself that I will move forward with my decision, I should start doing things that would be required for the transition. For example, I needed to buy a new laptop and a new camera because I shared them with my boyfriend at the time and didn’t have my own. I needed to buy new bed sheets because I didn’t want to keep the old sheets I used with him. I followed her advice and eventually moved out of the apartment that I shared with him, a month and a half after our official break-up. It was amicable. I didn’t rush out. I took the time that I needed to honor the relationship, adjust to our new reality, find a new home, and say goodbye to our life together.

Anyway, being inspired to move forward with a break-up and being inspired to cook are two completely different scenarios but inspiration is inspiration. Sometimes we need a little inspiration to motivate ourselves to do the not-so-fun stuff as well as the fun, creative stuff. Do things that will help you commit to your decision or goal and will propel you forward. Inspiration can come from the simplest action, gesture, or experience—a day at the beach, a hike in nature, playing music from your high school days, speaking with an old friend, meeting a new friend, a random conversation with someone, a kind encounter with a stranger, listening to a podcast, organizing your kitchen, or buying something new that will fit into your vision like the first piece of a puzzle. Be open to everything and mix things up. Hopefully, engaging in a little bit of Inspirational Foreplay will help get you aroused also :)